beauty

I just watched an incredible visual depiction of Christ's birth.  I watched the Nativity Story-I cried, smiled, and had my hand on my heart during several moments.

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Wow.  My breath has been taken away.  It's funny how something a little more tangible can make such a big difference.  I guess my story will be my visual representation of my journey with God. 

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Really though, we are so blessed in today's time.  We live very freely and experience the Lord in very different ways-but I guess I just need to remember that He remains with the same power and glory that He created the beginning with.

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Give unto the LORD the glory due unto his name; worship the LORD in the beauty of holiness.

        -Psalm 29:2

crash

Today the waves hit the rocks...they started to yesterday.  It's so interesting how these ups and downs just come and go.  How sometimes they are huge and surging with power, then at other times they seem to be still...resting.

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There are many bigger things to worry about, but I just can't seem to get away.  I wish that I were able to trust more.  I feel like I say that a lot.  I just have so much trouble understanding sometimes.  I know that God will reveal the answers to my "why's" in the right time, but my goodness is it hard to accept that.

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I'm going to have to be stronger.  I just have to.  I've taken the biggest risk of all and now I just have to trust that God will provide.

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I saw this on the Eldredge's website and really enjoyed it: "Nothing worth having comes without some sort of fight"-Bruce Cockburn.  

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It's time to fight harder.

present

God has really been talking to me about living in the present.

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My focus is usually what is ahead...or what has been.  I reminisce or I dream.

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I was listening to a sermon this morning where "self-talk" was discussed. Apparently we as average people hear 1200 words a minute of ourselves. Wow.  That's crazy-but really not surprising at all.  I'm always in my own head.  The thing that we must be careful of is what we are saying to ourselves.  I think that very regularly I talk to myself about the future, about my plans.  It's bad enough that that's a common thought, but even there I said "my" plans...

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God has been telling me to focus on NOW.  On what is sitting right in front of me.  We must be careful.  We must make a choice...that choice is to take the opportunity God is presenting to us with + go.

freedom

I am seeking some freedom.  I need to be freed from my past.  From my earthly treasures.  From the identity I've created for myself through others eyes + through my accomplishments.

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I have a lot of re-focusing to go through in this next chapter of my life.  

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I'm hoping to begin to be grateful + thankful for all that I have been blessed with.  I want to begin to understand everything I have been given. I want to live a life of abundance-not absence.  

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I am also hoping that I can become content with the place God has brought me to today.